1 + 1 = 11

Have you heard of the relationship viewpoint around 1 + 1 = 11?

It’s recently come into my orbit and I love the simplicity of its message. It’s something that I try to convey to the couples that I work with but have a hard time saying it as plain and simple as this.

The idea is that in a grounded and healthy relationship, you come together as two equal parts in your wholeness…1 + 1 and that this coming together equals two whole humans standing in their own uniqueness and strength to equal something much stronger than 2 but instead in 11.  The two 1’s standing in alignment together, side by side and not being expected to meld into each other to create 2.

It can seem a bit woo woo for some, and I get that.  But the most important part that I walk away from with this relational idea, is how important it is for us to do our own work in our partnership.  That if you come together and ½ + ½ , it can be a bit worrisome to see what that adds up to.

The value of knowing the wounds you need to heal, taking responsibility for how they were created, but in doing the work to attend to them, is highly important in relationships.  

Yes, your partnership can be a safe place to do your own work, but it shouldn’t be the place where you get to hide from your work or try to do each others for them.

Remember, the two of you are stronger as a couple when you are standing in your wholeness together!  Take the time to know that your work is just as important to your partnership as it is to you.

You got this! 

~ A